


A Pining Heart

by ImaMePanda



Category: The Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: Adopted Sibling Relationship, Amused spectator Nathan, Buck's a good big brother, Ezra's in love, F/M, Families of Choice, Humor, Papa Bear Josiah, Sibling Bonding, Team as Family, Teenagers, Unconventional Families, With Lei Pan, Young Peacekeepers 'Verse, Younger Seven
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-01
Updated: 2018-03-02
Packaged: 2019-03-25 18:29:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13840530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImaMePanda/pseuds/ImaMePanda
Summary: When Mr. Sanchez shows no sympathy for a pining heart, Ezra turns to the one member of the seven he knows is a romantic...with unexpected results. A slighty silly/cracky 3 shot.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is what happens when an English major uses assigned reading as inspiration. I own nothing by either Blake or Lord Byron, though I recommend Blake's Marriage of Heaven and Hell. Seriously, this whole thing was inspired by the Proverbs of Hell in the aforementioned work by Blake, and me going, "Hah, imagine YP (or really, any) Josiah's face if Ezra spouted off some of these at him." The plot came out of nowhere.

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His face was meant to be convincing, but Josiah could see the stubbornness in it, even as he kept half an eye on the long board he was planing, drawing his tool evenly back and forth, small shavings of yellow wood collecting at his feet. "Ezra, I've told you three times, my answer isn't going to change-though my patience is starting to run out-, *no*."

Huffing and making no effort to hide it-hopefully that meant the boy had realized he wasn't going to persuade him, but he wouldn't be holding his breath-Ezra drew himself up so his back was as straight as the two rows of pews he stood between, straightening his red jacket, and, voice bold, declared, just slightly scornful, "As the caterpillar chooses the fairest leaves to lay her eggs on, so the priest lays his curse on the fairest joys."

Josiah paused. He let go of the plane, letting it rest on the board, and turned his face and attention fully on the boy, straightening from where he'd been half bent over. "What did you say to me, son?" If he hadn't known the boy as well as he had, the slight shift in posture, the tiny bob of the adam's apple showing his nervousness would have gone unnoticed, but the preacher saw them. Good. A little bit of defiance was one thing, disrespect was another.

"Ah was merely using a quote from Blake to lend emphasis to mah argument. While Ah will allow that your concerns are not entirely based on moral grounds, they are certainly a strong component of your refusal, and Ah believe if you would truly listen to mah argument you would see that such a meeting would actually be a credit to mah moral character and development." Ezra's voice was more defensive than remorseful, still thinking he had a chance at getting his way, and Josiah raised an eyebrow at him, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I know it's from Blake, I lent you the book. You thought that quoting _that_ particular proverb would convince me?"

"Well, Ah believe that-", Ezra's voice had taken on the tone that meant that he was grasping for his words, making up the argument as he went along-and while that was a particular skill of his, it was not something that Josiah cared to listen to at the moment.

"Enough, Ezra. My answer isn't going to change, and I will not be happy if you keep arguing with me." Josiah made sure his unhappiness was clear in his voice, and while he wasn't particularly surprised at the scowl he got at that, he sure wasn't thrilled about it either.

"Fine, if you will not engage in a rational discussion of mah proposal, Ah will take mah leave." Ezra picked his hat up off pew back it had been resting on as Josiah nodded, choosing not to call him on the 'rational discussion' comment, and picking the wood plane back up.

"Alright, I'll see you at the saloon later.”

Having clearly gotten a different response to his statement than he had hoped for, back still stiff, Ezra only nodded, and turned around in a manner Josiah was sure he thought was dignified, but unless pouting could be in that category definitely wasn't. Shaking his head, he bent back over his work. He got where the boy was coming from, had certainly done his fair share of crazy things for romance-the last hadn't been that long ago, Josiah reminded himself with a grimace. Still, it was simply too far for him to go on his own, and even if one of the others would have been willing to go with him and Chris okayed it Josiah wasn't sure it was a good idea.

“I sure as heck never heard a proverb like the one Ez was spoutin' before.” Nathan's deep voice came from the back of the large room, surprising Josiah so he was lucky he didn't take a gouge out of the board. Man could appear and disappear nearly as silently as Vin, and had a skill for blending into the background when he wanted that made him almost invisible. Josiah didn't like to think on the necessity that had ingrained it in him. Setting the plane back down with a sigh, as he clearly wasn't getting any work done for awhile, he gave Nathan a _look_ as he leaned against the doorway to his bedroom, his little brother having the good grace to look a little sheepish.

“Just how long have you been standing there, brother?”

“Right as Ezra was telling you all about how you're cursing all the joys in his life.” Nathan was clearly at least as amused as he was disapproving, and Josiah found himself snorting before he could stop it. It really had been quite melodramatic, and now that he wasn't dealing with it he supposed he could admit it was funny. “Figured interrupting probably wouldn't help. I was coming to get you for patrol-Mrs. Davis is convinced she's dying when there ain't nothing wrong with her again, I examined her twice already today, and when I saw her coming down the street again I decided to duck around the back.”

Grimacing in sympathy, because that woman was a hypochondriac both medically and spiritually and in the month the family had been in the town had come to talk to him about every sort of religious crisis a person could possibly have, and visited Nathan about twice as often, Josiah waved Nathan forward as he made sure the plane was centered and not going to go tumbling to the floor before he moved away from his project, supposing he could forgive the eavesdropping this once. “Just let me get my coat and hat and I'll be ready to go. 'Fraid there's no way to get to the livery without crossing the street though, so you'll have to risk it.”

“Guess that's a chance I'll have to take,” Nathan said, voice resigned, but eyes teasing and Josiah chuckled as he stepped over to the first pew and grabbed his jacket off the seat where it had slid down to lay in a heap, his hat at least sitting to the side where he'd left it.

“For the good of the town?”

“And 'cause Chris would kick my butt if I missed patrol on account of hiding from a sixty-eight year old woman barely comes up to my elbow.” Josiah barked out a laugh that filled the room at that, and, shaking his head in amusement, started for the door, Nathan following after. All his joking around didn't keep Nathan from looking both ways down the street before he ventured out of the safety of the church or Josiah from chuckling at him again and ignoring Nathan's unimpressed look back. Neither man wanting to tarry in the street and wind up tangling with the old woman-if she thought she was dying she'd probably ask Josiah to perform last rites- they hurried down the down the steps and over the rutted road in the direction of the the livery, no more words exchanged between them until they were inside.

“So what in the world did Ezra want to do, anyway?” Nathan asked as he unlatched Brevet's stall, stroking the horse's silky face from just below the eyes to the top of his nose, the patient horse accepting it as his due, “Go to some high-stakes game in Purgatory or something like that?”

Stopping as he got to Bright's stall, Josiah shook his head, “No, but there are some days it wouldn't surprise me.” Unlatching the door he greeted Bright, who lightly rubbed his head on Josiah's shirt and vest, leaving a trail of short white and brown hairs, and prompting a not at all serious, “Thanks, friend,” from the preacher. He scratched up and down Bright's face, removing more of those apparently itchy hairs-it was an early spring, and hot enough for him to be losing his winter coat already. Josiah hadn't been sure he could take to another horse after Job, but the gentle, eager to please horse had wormed his way in. He could feel Nathan's eyes on him, waiting for the story and decided to make him wait a little longer as he started tacking up the horse. He wouldn't have been so curious if he'd let them know he was there, either Ezra would have tried to appeal to his brother's romantic side, likely through reminding him of Rain, or shut his mouth entirely, and waiting wouldn't hurt him. It wasn't until he had everything done, including tightening the cinch, and Nathan's impatience was palpable, that he spoke again, looking over and meeting the curious brown eyes. “Your brother wants me to let him go all the way to San Francisco to visit Lei Pan for a week. In her last letter she apparently told him that her family wanted to meet the person who helped her get home. Not only am I not letting him go that far by himself, period, but, since he wouldn't even let me see the letter, I'm not entirely sure that means they invited a boy they've never met to stay in the same house as their daughter for a week.” Josiah wasn't naive by any means, and was fairly certain just how Ezra and Lei Pan's relationship had grown while she stayed in town, but if her parents had an inkling about that he wasn't sure Ezra's reception would be any too welcoming.

“Especially a white boy,” Nathan sighed, giving a regretful shake of his head as he started leading Brevet out of his stall, and, when Josiah looked at him, surprised, said, “What? You know I'm right. And I can't imagine Mrs. Standish would approve either. It's sweet that he's still writing her, though-and I don't blame the boy at all for not showing you his love letter, I wouldn't have shown my Daddy something like that. Heck, I wouldn't show _you_ something like that, 'Siah.” The look on Nathan's face told Josiah he was more than a little crazy to have expected that, and he nodded reluctantly.

“I'll give you that one, Nate. It's the sort of thing a man keeps to himself.” Taking Bright's lead, Josiah waited until Nathan had passed him on his way to the backdoor before guiding the horse after him, Bright's steps getting eager as they got closer to the exit. “Still worried about running into Mrs. Davis?”

Nathan chuckled ruefully, turning his head to look at Josiah over his shoulder, “Like you aren't?”

“Nah,” the older man gave his brother a wicked grin as he shook his head, “I figure I'll just throw you at her and make my get away while she's not looking.”

“Heck, Josiah, that's just plain mean.” Stepping out the backdoor after Nathan, who'd turned Brevet away from the corral and towards the edge of town, Josiah just kept up his wicked grin as Nathan prepared to mount up.

“Needs must when the devil drives, brother.”

*.*.*.*.*.*

Ezra sulked as he walked down the boardwalk. He was careful not to appear as though he were sulking to anyone walking by, but his skills at persuading others never seemed to work on himself when he most desired them to. He was sulking, there was no denying that, and had no intention of stopping doing so anytime soon.

For a man so tenderly effected by the stirrings of his own heart, Josiah was sorely lacking in fellow feeling or sympathy for one of his brethren so afflicted. The man simply refused to see reason or to truly take into consideration any of the proposals presented to him. During their long letter exchange his affections had not dwindled for Lei Pan, his yellow rose. If anything, distance had only encouraged their growth, like flames being worked by a bellow, they seemed to fan brighter everyday, enveloping him.

When he pictured her face, smiling at him, or relaxed in sleep those precious few times he'd been able to watch her...it may have made him sound like one of the damsels in JD's dime novels, but sometimes he felt as though his heart would simply burst with the feeling of it.

Stopping and leaning against a post outside the saloon Ezra looked up at the blue sky, only a few wispy clouds blocking the sun, still high in the sky, and pulled his hat down to his chest. Thinking about her made bits of poetry flit through his head, lines and stanzas of Byron and both Brownings appearing unbidden.

She walks in beauty, like the night  
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;  
And all that’s best of dark and bright  
Meet in her aspect and her eyes

He was growing ridiculously smitten-it was the middle of the day, while that verse and poem were apropos of his love, it was a poem of the night, meant to be thought of once the last rays of the sun had faded, not when they were beating down on the town, baking the earth. Yet, it was as though Ezra had no control over where his head was going any longer. Truthfully, at times it frightened him, the fullness of his feelings for her, the way thoughts of Lei Pan could could drive everything else away...

He'd never read poetry to her, and the longer they stayed separated the more he thought he would never get the chance.

“Lord, that was a mighty big sigh! You about blew me right over, Hoss.” Startling, Ezra straightened as his eyes flew to Buck, who was slumped against the next post down, and from his comfortable position, he realized with dawning horror, had been there for awhile. And he said Ezra had been _sighing?_ Surely not, now he was acting like the love struck hero from some romance.  Trying to behave as though he'd been perfectly aware of Buck the whole time, and completely ignoring his statement, Ezra nodded at his brother.

“Good afternoon, Buck. How are you occupying yourself on this fine day?” Buck just smirked at him, and Ezra fought the urge to scowl at the knowing look in his eyes.

“Well, I'm sure as shootin' not spendin' it gazing all moon-eyed at the sky.” Bristling and not bothering to hide it now, Ezra opened his mouth to inform Buck in his most outraged tones that he was doing nothing of the kind, and would not stand for such slander-only to stop himself short as he realized just what an opportunity he had in front of him. Buck, for all his rough manners and peculiar turns of phrase, was in matters of the fairer sex ever a knight on horseback, and certainly a romantic through and through. This was the one of the seven, Ezra found himself sure, who would know how knavish it was to deny a lady-love your presence at their side when requested. “Okay, now you're looking at me like the cat that ate the canary-or the Ezra who thinks he's struck gold.” Ezra put on his best innocent and earnest expression, but Buck just shook his head with that smirk still on his face, letting him know without a word that he wasn't fooled or impressed, “Do I wanna know what's going on in that head of yours?”

“Nothing so mercenary as you are thinking, Mr. Wilmington.” Ezra tilted his head consideringly at Buck, as though he were thinking things over, even though he'd already come to his conclusion. Buck only looked more amused, but Ezra was certain he was pulling him in. Finally, when Buck was starting to look just a little antsy with his examination, Ezra nodded. “It is, howevah, a mattah of some delicacy and one you may be particularly suited for helping me examine the intricacies of-Ah trust that if Ah were to share mah private thoughts with you they would be kept between the two of us?”

Buck studied him for a long moment, before slowly nodding, “Long as it ain't somethin' 'Siah would kill me for not tellin' him, sure.” Ezra shook his head, but before he had a chance to tell him that Josiah was already well informed of the situation, Buck straightened, a grin far bigger than before spreading across his face and one hand reflexively going to his hat, as though he had discovered something, “Wait a minute-this is about a girl, ain't it? That's why you said I was suited and were staring off all starry-eyed and all-You want some woman advice from your big brother Buck! Well, pard, you're right, I'm definitely the right man for the job!” Ezra tried to motion Buck to lower his voice, certain that if he were to look around he'd see townspeople staring, but before he could the man had thrown an arm about his shoulders, pulling him to his side and propelling them both towards the saloon's batwing doors, “For this kind of talk we're gonna need a drink, maybe a couple-and heck, you can watch me and Inez, that oughta give you some good pointers.”

Good Lord, Ezra groaned to himself, as Buck all but towed him into the saloon, as cheerful as he'd ever seen him, what had he been thinking?

  



	2. Chapter 2

*.*.*.*.*

Buck leaned back in his chair and listened indulgently as Ezra poured out his heart, not bothering to keep the grin off his face, though he was reining in the teasing about moon-eyes and love sick calves. Didn't want to scare his little brother off after all, not when Buck could see he was so clearly in need of his good advice. Letting his glass slide back and forth between his fingers on the rough table he nodded occasionally as Ezra waxed on about Lei Pan's charms. Kid was all but spouting verse, and while Buck had never understood the point of longing for someone far away, not when there were so many lovely and charming ladies all around, he'd learned when Chris had his heart set on Sarah, not even a buckshot filled backside enough to deter him, that sense had nothing to do with romance. If it did Buck would have had a heck of a lot less notches on his belt, anyway. The boy finished up a couple lines about how Lei Pan occupied his thoughts at all times, Buck not able to help the, “Probably your dreams too,” that slipped out, but where JD would have been scandalized and probably screeched his name like a scalded alley cat, Ezra's cheeks tinted the slightest bit pink, he nodded and let out a slightly over dramatic sigh. Jeez, this kid had it _bad_.

“Yes, even in mah sleep Ah pine for her,” Ezra said, like it was a confession, “Being separated is like torture of a kind unknown to man, only to devils.” Huh. Okay, no matter how bad he had it for that pretty little China girl, Buck hadn't expected him to admit to something like that and he had to stop his eyebrows climbing to his hairline as he answered. He found himself wondering if Ezra wasn't laying it on just a mite too thick...

“Well, a woman can do that to a man, torture him without ever meanin' to.” Inez passed by then, carrying a tray to another table, and Buck called out to her, “Just like you're torturin' me with this ruse, darlin', makin' me suffer by pretendin' you don't care for me.”

Inez shot him an annoyed look over her shoulder, snapping out, “I hope it's painful...El burro sabe masque tu!” Buck put his hand to his heart and pretended to slump in his seat, jerking a little like he'd taken a bullet right to the organ.

“You're killin' me here, Inez, with this cold shoulder.”

Setting down the tray Inez nodded at her customer, smiling as they thanked her, and then walked back towards the kitchen, stopping long enough to say, “One can only hope,” and, to Ezra, “This is who you ask for advice?”, then, with a swirl of her skirts, disappeared behind the bar.

Buck had seen the half smile on her face. She might not ever admit it out loud, but Inez liked him plenty, and the dance between the two of them was one hell of a lot of fun. He turned back to Ezra, who was trying not to look horrified that Inez had figured out what they were talking about, but heck they were sitting close to the bar and the saloon was half deserted, too early for the night time crowd, but late enough most folks were thinking about heading home for supper-weren't enough voices to drown them out. Inez was a sharp woman, nothing that happened in her bar got past her anyway. “Heck, don't mind Inez, pard, betcha she'd think you writing to Lei Pan was real sweet, right romantic thing to do.” Ezra looked even more horrified, and Buck tried to choke back his laugh, he really did, but it only came out strangled, half snorted out his nose.

“Ah think perhaps Ah was hasty in-” Ezra started to rise out of his chair and Buck put up his hands, waving to him to sit back down enthusiastically. Not only did he actually want to help his little brother with whatever his girl problem was-heck, who else was the kid gonna ask? Josiah, maybe, but out of the rest Buck was the only real choice-but at this point he wanted to know because he was at least half certain that Ezra had something up his sleeve, and that was never good.

“Whoa, hold on there, hoss, you ain't even givin' me a chance to help you out here! C'mon, you gotta at least ask your question before decidin' I don't have the answer.” Ezra looked at him doubtfully, and Buck gave him his most winning smile. “If you don't like my advice, ya don't gotta use it, but you seemed like you really wanted it earlier.” Slowly, Ezra sank back into his chair, nodding a little.

As Ezra carried on a bit longer, still laying it on more than a bit thick, Buck's brain went back to working, starting from that damn cat that ate the canary look. Buck Wilmington might be a sentimental sap, but he was no fool. The boy wasn't lying exactly... that wistful, dreamy look he'd had on outside was definitely no lie-but Ezra was working some kind of angle, was trying to get something out of him. Buck might not have spotted it, but all the kids, hell, even Nathan, had him pegged as the easy mark, the one who'd most likely give in if they asked for something-they weren't wrong, he liked to be the fun one, and more than once just hadn't seen the harm in something-only to have Chris or Josiah asking him what the heck he'd been thinking later.

Which meant he had nearly as much experience as Josiah with Ezra trying to talk him into things, and one like this-where the kid _was_ using his real emotions as part of the gambit, had actually told him he'd been writing letters to her when he had to know Buck was gonna tease him about that like crazy eventually-that was going to be something big.

Really, Buck thought as he twisted his glass around in his hands it was pretty sweet that the boy would put himself out like that for his little girly, that she meant that much to him. He really hoped that this was something he could help him with, not something he was going to have to put the kibosh on, but Buck wasn't going to hold his breath.

“In her latest missive she extended me the honor of an invitation to the fair town of San Francisco to meet her family and stay for a time.” Oh boy. Hoss sure didn't ask for a lot, Buck thought, taking a swallow off his drink. Unless Josiah had said yes-which was not a bet Buck would take no matter how big the payoff-and Ezra was going to ask him for help picking out a gift to take her, his little brother was going to be mighty disappointed at the end of this conversation. “Her parents wish to meet the man who helped send her back to them, and Lei Pan herself has said that she longs for mah presence.”

Fighting down the urge to ask if he was sure that was what Lei Pan was longing for-this wasn't Chris, or even Josiah, but that didn't mean that that wasn't the perfect set-up-, Buck nodded thoughtfully, “And what does 'Siah have to say about the invitation?”

Ezra twisted his glass, which had mostly sat ignored this whole time, around slightly, nerves showing, which was a give away that the preacher had said no if there ever was one. “Mistah Sanchez does not quite understand the importance of this situation, and you know yourself how ovahprotective he can be. He always carries on as though immediate death and destruction is due if one of us steps out of his sight.” Ezra went to carry on, but Buck cut him off with a laugh, shaking his head.

“No offense pard, but you youngin's haven't exactly given him reason to think otherwise.”

Ezra looked a little exasperated, and declared, “Perhaps that is so, Ah can admit to having made some less than stellar decisions in mah time with you gentleman, but Ah am growing oldah and it has been some time since any such incidents have occurred. Ah have a more mature outlook on-”

“Yep, sure, you're a big boy now,” Buck rolled his eyes, and when Ezra stared at him, incensed, Buck fixed him with a look, “That's why you broke cover in the middle of a gunfight, just stood up straight, and scared the life out of all of us two months ago.” Ezra maintained his offended stare for a good twenty seconds of Buck drilling his eyes into his and then seemed to realize that wasn't getting him anywhere and dropped them contritely to the table.

“Ah only broke covah for a second before dropping down again-and they were aiming at Sue Ellen, simply to be cruel.” Ezra might be acting contrite, but there was a hint of rebellion, of still thinking he'd been right in his tone, and even two months later it set Buck's hackles on edge.

“Hoss, Sue Ellen is a _cat._ ”

“Amelia and Josh's cat!” Ezra's head came up as he made his point, and Buck had to suck in a breath before he continued. He loved Hoss like crazy-wouldn't have cared what the boy did if he didn't, would he?-but out of all his brother's except Chris the boy could get his dander up the worst. JD was exasperating, but not like this.

Not to mention baffle the hell out of him. He'd been worried the boy would be jealous of the twins as Josiah and Mrs. Potter's almost courtship progressed, but he'd become just as protective of the two as he was of JD.

It would've been cute if it hadn't nearly gotten him killed. “Ezra, I gotta tell you, you ain't doin' a good job convincin' me you wouldn't make more 'less than stellar decisions' on your way to San Francisco, let alone once you're there. And it ain't me ya have to convince anyway, it's Josiah.”

“Ah would find no trouble simply because all mah faculties would be invested in preparing for meeting Lei Pan and making a positive impression on her parents-what sort of gentleman does not go to the side of the one you desire to court when her parents have requested it? It would be nothing short of ghastly to not present mahself to them in a timely mannah.” Wondering if Ezra really understood the meeting the parents part of courtship, what it implied, and thinking he might just have found a way to convince him to put off his visit for a few years yet, Buck waited, seeing that Ezra was finally winding up to his big finale. “Ah thought you, Buck, knowing you have the heart of a true romantic, one who does not give up or allow obstacles to stand in your way, would be best able to help me solve mah dilemma-without inciting Mr. Sanchez's wrath onto either of our persons, of course.”

Buck took another sip of his whiskey-Ezra had tried to get him to buy them each a glass of port, but that wasn't happening on a dollar a day and he was extra glad he hadn't given in now-as he tried to keep an exasperated look off his face. Boy, when the kid had said it wasn't something 'Siah would kill him for Buck had actually believed him for awhile, and now he found himself wondering why. “Hoss, I know you ain't askin' me to help you sneak outta town, 'cause you might be slipperier than spit on a doorknob, but you ain't slippery enough to get past the preacher, and if you try I might just whup your behind myself.”

A very brief flash of pure disappointment passed over Ezra's face, something in what Buck's voice apparently sinking that big, shiny, NO in deep, but it was Ezra, so he recovered in time to look appropriately offended, “Certainly not! Ah merely was hoping that you would help me to persuade him into a more agreeable outlook on the venture.”

“Uh-huh, sure you were.” Seeing his little brother's face start to screw up in indignation, Buck carried on before he could protest, “Before you tell me what you had in mind, why don't we talk about just what Miss Lei Pan is probably expecting if she's invitin' you home to ma and pa, little brother.” He leaned back in his chair, the sternness gone from his face, but the seriousness not moving an inch and made sure to catch Ezra's eye straight on. A shadow of wariness passed across Ezra's face, mostly sticking to his eyes. Good. That's exactly how Buck wanted him to look.

“While, Ah would think that she is wanting me to show that there is potential in our future match...”

Buck shook his head, snorted out a muted, “ _Future_ ,” and then tossed the rest of his drink back. Ezra wasn't the only one who knew how to pull other people in. Sure enough, his brother shifted a little in his seat, his hands moving to straighten out already perfectly straight coat sleeves. “A girl don't invite you home to her folks until she's thinkin' that the future's comin' awful quick, and that's the plain truth right there. Not when you're here and she's all the way in 'Frisco.”

“Nonsense, Lei Pan is enjoying her time with her family after their separation, and Ah-Ah have mah duties here, and that's ignoring the fact that neither of us have reached the age of majority. She knows Ah need time to build mah fortune, to repurchase the saloon at the least.” Ezra's eyes didn't reflect the confidence the rest of his face showed, and his voice wasn't any too convincing either.

“You sure about that, pard?” Buck tilted his head questioningly, “I'd be willing to bet you ain't the only one staring off into the clouds, building castles, and what are you going to do if you show up and that is what she expects? You going to disappoint her?” The face looking back at him couldn't quite conceal its horror, and Buck had to fight to keep the amused satisfaction off his face. This was easier than he'd expected. “Now, you just listen to ol' Buck, we'll get this all straightened out...”

 

*.*.*.*.*

 


	3. Chapter 3

Ezra walked up the stairs towards his room in a bit of a daze, Buck's words of warning swimming around in his cranium. Did Lei Pan really think...? Surely not, they were much too young, Lei Pan younger than him...though, he knew his mother and father had not been much older then either of them when they'd married, and the young couple that had moved into the Emers abandoned homestead were both twenty and had been married for over a year.

They were expecting their first child soon, Nathan worrying that, as Julie Pilson was a slight, delicate, young thing, it would be hard on her. That was what came after marriage, offspring, helpless infants who required both homes and parents to raise them. Ezra found himself shuddering at the idea-he'd lost the saloon almost the moment it had come into his possession, no matter the circumstances, and he certainly couldn't support a family on a dollar a day! They'd starve-no wonder his Mother had never seemed to stop 'working' until she had a new stepfather or at least his fortune secured. He didn't even have a child and the idea was terrifying.

Mr. Sanchez said _he_ was still a child, and while Ezra certainly didn't agree, the thought of marriage made him feel very, very young.

Ezra wasn't entirely sure his older brother was remotely correct, but if he was Ezra simply couldn't go. He didn't want to risk offending her either, let alone hurting her feelings. The idea of his words making Lei Pan cry...Ezra swallowed as he opened his door and stepped through, he simply would have to have an especial delicacy when choosing his words, hurting her was not an option.

Nor, he realized, as a rush of horror washed over him as he shut the door behind him and moved to his small writing desk, was humiliating himself if Mr. Wilmington were incorrect and marriage was the last thing on Lei Pan's mind an acceptable outcome either.

Somehow, he had to compose a missive that covered every possibility, preferably without ever mentioning matrimony or anything related to it, and hopefully without imparting any sorrow on his beloved. Sinking down into his seat, Ezra took a deep breath and then pulled a piece of stationary and his inkwell towards himself. This was going to be a lengthy procedure.

_My darling Lei Pan,_

_I hope my letter reaches your shining visage with no delay..._

*.*.*.*.*

  
  


Nathan sighed in relief as he made it into the saloon without being waylaid by Mrs. Davis or her daughter, Josiah a step behind him. The daughter was almost worse than Mrs. Davis, buying into every word her mother said and being as scared as anybody would be over their momma. Peering around the crowded, smokey room, Nathan saw Buck at their usual table, waving him and Josiah over and looking pleased enough with himself that Nathan felt a surge of apprehension. A Buck that was that happy, without a woman in his lap, could mean all sorts of things, most of them not good. As he made his way through the crowd, the usual townsfolk and passer throughs added to by it being payday for the Larson's ranch, the passel of cowhands sprawled around, crowding up the room so that it seemed almost like you were going to step on one any minute, Nathan looked around automatically for the rest of the seven. JD was at the bar, probably trying to get a concha off Inez even though it wasn't a baking day, but Buck and him were it. As they got close, Buck straightened in his seat, and raised his drink like he was making a toast. "Well, Preacher, I think I managed to solve a problem I'm not even sure you knew you had." Pulling out and plopping his tired body into a seat one down from Buck, Nathan sensed rather than saw wariness descend over Josiah as he settled slowly into the seat next to him.  
  
"That so? How do you know I needed it solved if I didn't even know about it?" Buck waved a hand through the air, dismissing misgivings Josiah hadn't even voiced yet. Before he could speak up again Nathan popped in, shaking his head.

"Heck Buck, I'm not even the one you're talking too and I'm worrying on what you're talking about."

The lothario rolled his eyes, and gave Nathan a look that told him that wasn't a surprise, "You're always worryin' about something, you'd think none of the rest of us had any sense the way you carry on. Regular worry-wart, Nate, and no doubt about it."

"If you had half the sense you think you have I wouldn't have too." Both of them were grinning, only half serious in their chiding, but wanting to get a bit of his own back for that worry-wart remark, Nathan raised an eyebrow, asking, “By the way, how's that pitchfork _scratch_ you got when Mark Wiley found you in the barn with his sister? Ain't been back to the clinic since I dressed it.”

Not near as flustered as Nathan had hoped he'd be-he should have known better, though he saw the way Buck's eyes darted to Josiah for just a second-Buck shrugged, “It's healin' up just fine, Doc, if it weren't I woulda told ya-I ain't Vin.”

“Still, I wanna see it tonight, just to make sure.” Nathan said it firmly, wanting to make it clear that this part he wasn't joking about.

“Should be careful, Nathan, sayin' you want to see another man's rear end, folks might think you're funny.” Buck grinned as Nathan scowled at him, the man finally letting out a belly laugh and adding, “Heck, alright, alright, I'll let ya make sure my ass-cheek ain't gonna fall off.”

“Good. Don't think they make saddles for folks missing one.”

“Wiley went after you with a pitchfork?” Josiah, accepting the beer mugs he must have signaled for at some point from the saloon girl who carried the tray over-Miss Laurie, Nathan thought, though she was new enough in town he wasn't sure-was mostly amused, but there was a wrinkle of worry on his forehead as he slid one of them over to a grateful and thirsty Nathan.

“Aw, it ain't nothin', 'Siah, Wiley ain't nothin' to be scared of. Just a little scratch on the side of my ass, anyway, hardly even bled.” Buck swallowed the last of his beer as Nathan harrumphed into his own. Hardly bled his ass, and calling it a groove would be a lot more honest than a scratch. “Man just doesn't want to accept that Nancy didn't have to be misled into my arms, she came willingly and left happily. _Mighty_ happily.”

“Well, you might want to think before making her 'mighty happy' again any time soon-man might have a shotgun handy instead of a pitchfork next time.” Josiah raised an eyebrow as he said it, but Buck just laughed.

“I'll make sure we ain't in the barn come chore time, how about that?”

“Better than nothing,” was Josiah's wry response. "Now, are you going to tell me just what problem of mine you solved Brother Buck, or leave me wondering?" Nathan caught the undertone of 'and worrying', but if Buck did he let it slide off him like water off a duck's back, just nodding and still looking mighty pleased with himself.

"I'm gettin' to it, I'm gettin' to it-was the doc here that distracted me." Pleased with having his audience on tenterhooks-the man was as bad as Ezra at showing off, maybe worse-it took Buck another minute to actually start, shifting in his chair in a way that made Nathan think he needed that wound seen to whether he liked it or not and taking another gulp of his beer, longer than the last.

"Brother Buck, patience might be a virtue, but it's not my strong one."

That got Buck talking, leaning forward conspiratorially, "Well, Ezra was a might upset earlier, and came askin' for some advice. Guess you said no to him going to see that Lei Pan girl?" Josiah's brow furrowed as he listened, Nathan watching him out of one eye while wondering just what Ezra had wanted Buck's advice for, letting Lei Pan down gently or sneaking off to San Franciso? Not that he really thought Buck would help with the second one, but he wouldn't be at all surprised if Ezra had asked. And Lord only knew what he *had* told Ezra, or just how their brother would twist his advice to suit him.

"I did, and while I'm sorry he's upset, I won't be changing my mind." Josiah said it firmly, voice a little wary again and Nathan figured he was wondering the same thing he was, whether Buck had solved the problem or made it worse.

"Well, he ain't gonna be askin' you again, in fact I'd say visitin' that little lady is going to be about the last thing he wants to do for a few years yet."

"What'd you do?" Nathan didn't plan to say it, at least not so accusatorially, but even when Buck gave him a miffed look he didn't back down, "Lei Pan's a sweet girl, and Ezra really likes her, ya shouldn't do anything to mess with that."

Buck's miffed look turned into a soft, though slightly exasperated one, a face that was directed at JD more than anyone else, and Nathan felt a bit sheepish, realizing that he should've known better. Buck was the last person to try and discourage young love, you only had to look at the way he grinned whenever JD was with Casey, practically throwing them together. "I didn't do nothing like that, just reminded him that when a girl invites you home to meet her family it might mean she's thinking about wedding bells. 'Bout scared the pants off him."

Nathan's mouth dropped open, not sure whether to laugh or not, as Josiah's surprised, "You did what?" boomed over the table. Then, to Nathan's surprise, the man snorted, drew in another breath, chuckled, and then finally started laughing, hard. Buck was grinning like anything again and Nathan shook his head at both of them, even as a smile played around his own lips. Wiping tears from his eyes and shaking his head, Josiah said slowly, between chuckles, "Have to admit that way of convincing him hadn't occurred to me. Does seem like it would be mighty effective."

"Josiah, you were all set to go marry that Emma woman when you weren't much older than Ezra-it's great if it worked, but he could be halfway to Frisco right now, planning to get a ring along the way." Nathan could see it, and he could also see his fancy dressed little brother being chased out of Chinatown right quick, if Lei Pan's parents weren't as welcoming as Ezra seemed to think. Maybe with something a little more dangerous than a pitchfork.

"Considering Chaucer was still in his stall when we got in, I'm not going to worry about that just yet-still," he said turning to Buck, "if we have to chase after him, I'm bringing you along for the ride."

"I'd come along just for the showdown when you caught up to him if he did, but I'm tellin' you, you don't have to worry none about that. I got him thinkin' that at the very least that kinda visit means she's wantin' to settle things down in stone, and might just want to tie the knot then and there. And, you know Ezra-boy's mighty gone on her, but he's wantin' to make his fortune, started talkin' about how he'd need to get the saloon back before anythin' like that happened, and I reminded him that a lady ain't gonna want to live in a room above the saloon more than likely, not when she's a wife." Buck was clearly well satisfied with the advice he'd given, nodding at Josiah at the end of his speech, as if to say 'you're welcome' and while Nathan wasn't sure he was convinced himself, Josiah nodded back.

"Thank you, that does take some of the load providence has piled on lately off. And thank you for being a good brother to him."

Buck looked a little flustered at that-Nathan had noticed that as much as the man liked to brag, sincere praise often seemed to throw him a bit-but nodded, "It's what I'm here for, right?" He shifted over, playfully swiping at Nathan's head, “Lookin' after these youngins.” Nathan slid easily out of his range, and took a drink off his beer with a roll of his eyes. Sometimes, it was real easy to forget that Buck was the older one. Before he could respond JD bustled up to their table, talking a mile a minute the second he was close enough to be heard.

"Hey, guess what! Inez has this new drink called sarsaparilla that she got off that peddler that came through a couple days ago, only a little bit of it, and she let me have some! It's really good, tastes kind of like caramel and vanilla." He almost jumped into the seat inbetween Buck and Nathan, shaking it so that Buck automatically reached out a hand to steady his chair as the three of them exchanged glances, a silent declaration made. JD wasn't to hear a word of this, or it would be back to Ezra before supper time.

"Yeah?" Buck said, reaching over for the mug that JD held in front of him, "If it's so good why don't you pass some of it on over this way?"

"Nah, Buck, Inez gave it to me!" The two tussled over the drink, JD yelping indignantly as some of it splashed over the rim, "Hey, stop it!"

"Alright, alright, but you're being mighty mean comin' over and braggin' about how good it is and not sharin'." Buck sighed over dramatically as he let his hands drop, “and you know how much I love caramel...” The mournful face Buck put on didn't move JD in the slightest, the boy snorting as he shook his head.

“If you want some so bad go ask Inez. If you're lucky she might give you a sip.” Buck tried to keep the mournful face on, but Nathan could see the corners of his lips trying to pull themselves up, and a second later he was knocking JD's hat to the floor, far enough away the boy had to scramble out of his chair to grab it.

“Buck! Can't you find nothing else to do but mess with my hat?” Buck, meanwhile, had grabbed the drink JD had forgotten all about with the injury to his hat and was taking a slow sip off of it, JD's annoyed screech as he turned around, hat in tow, and saw what their brother had been up too, loud as anything. “Hey, that ain't fair!”

“This is pretty good stuff,” Buck grinned at JD over the glass as he slid back into his seat, making a grab for the mug that Buck easily dodged, “can see why you didn't want to share...ain't sure I want to give it back.” Another game of keep away started, roles reversed, Nathan sliding his chair away from the roughhousing, pretty sure the drink was going to be splashing onto somebody any minute, and having no plans for it to be him. JD finally managed to get the drink away, only losing about a quarter of what was left in the glass to do it, and must have decided it was too precious to risk wasting anymore since he tipped the mug up and finished the rest in a few short swallows.

“Hah, all gone.” JD looked triumphantly at Buck who just grinned at him.

“All I wanted was a taste, and I got it, plenty satisfied and thank you kindly.” JD clearly wasn't quite sure how to take this, his victory not as sweet without Buck complaining. Nathan caught Josiah's eye and grinned. Sometimes, Buck didn't seem much older than JD.

*.*.*.*.*

Lei Pan nodded to the postmaster after he gave her the small stack of mail, one letter that her father had been expecting and one, she saw to her delight, from her Ezra. As she stepped out of the small post office and onto the street, Lei Pan slipped through the crowd of mostly men walking up and down the crowded sidewalk, glad she didn't have far to go until she was back to her family's shop. When she was nearly there, almost to the door, Lei Pan slid into the alley that sat between her parent's shop and the laundry next door. Her parents knew she wrote to Ezra, but they had no idea how often, or the true nature of it, as she knew it would alarm them. The only one who knew was her sister, and she would never tell. Carefully breaking the seal, Lei Pan moved over to a row of crates that the Huang family had left in the alley for when the laundry grew too hot and sank down, knowing she wouldn't be missed for awhile. A smile played about her lips as she slowly read his letter, fingers tracing the words as she deciphered the English. Oh, how she missed her beautiful red-coated man, his flowing script reminding her somehow of his perfectly coiffed hair.

Slowly, a confused frown took the place of the smile on her face, Lei Pan rereading several sentences to make sure she had understood them right. Ezra seemed to be apologizing for not being able to travel to see her, but as much as she would be delighted by a visit, no invitation had been made. Her family would think it improper, even if there hadn't been too much work to do, and no where to put a visitor. Thinking, Lei Pan quickly realized where the confusion may have come from, a blush setting over her features...she had told him, or tried too, in her still far from perfect English, that the city was crowded with visitors this time of year, the already crowded streets spilling over with people, even here...and that she wouldn't mind it so if one of the visitors was her Ezra. She had not meant for him to take it as a summons!

It was certainly a lovely idea to entertain, Ezra sweeping in the door of the shop and whisking her away for a day or two...

Allowing her thoughts to drift into daydream for a moment, Lei Pan sighed, and then shook her head to clear it. She only had another minute or two before her mother would be calling for her, and still had part of the letter to read. Lei Pan read each word slowly, savoring them, her heart swelling as she read between the lines of his regretful apology.

Ezra spoke of the future- _their future-_ , of wanting to appear nothing less than a perfect match when he met her parents. _Their_ future. She'd hoped that was what he wanted, that she was correct in his intent, but this was the first time either of them had talked of such things. 

At seventeen, she was in no hurry to do as many of her cousins back home had done at her age, marry quickly and move to her in-laws home, and Mama and Baba seemed happy to keep her close, worried after what her uncle had done when they'd trusted her to him. But someday...she could feel the smile growing on her face, blushing for a different reason now.

“Lei Pan!” Hearing her mother calling her, Lei Pan jumped to her feet, the crate shifting back far more noisily than she liked, quickly tucking the letter into the inside of her waistband as she hurried towards the street and the waiting work.

 

 

 


End file.
